Forget Star Trek Into Darkness for a moment, surely it’s
time for Odeon Into Administration. Last night I was crammed into a packed Screen Three with twelve other desperate souls, clutching my 3D glasses and praying
the film I was about to watch was worth the extortionate amount of money I had just
thoughtlessly handed over. Firstly, I had to give the miserable sod behind the
counter £9.40 because Sunday is peak-time viewing. Could have fooled me.
Packing punters into one row of the cinema doesn’t kid anyone. It’s just
uncomfortable.
But wait, we’re then charged an extra two pounds because we’re
watching a 3D film. We have little choice. There is no 2D version showing that
evening. We don’t have 3D glasses either. And no, we didn’t recycle them like
Odeon would like us to. Screw that. Mine are probably gathering dust under the
bed, or maybe I took them to Tunisia last September, ignoring the helpful
information stamped all over the packaging: THESE ARE NOT SUNGLASSES. Um,
really? The total price for a standard seat – if you haven’t added it by now –
was a staggering £12.40 to watch a film that will cost three pounds less to own on DVD in a
few months.
Here’s an idea though, Odeon. Why not slash your prices by
50%? Call me silly, but at just over six notes a movie I’m guessing more than
double the twelve that turned up last night will show; and I reckon some of the
former defectors will even be silly enough to buy some of your ridiculously
overpriced and unsatisfying food. It’s not rocket science. As for the film, it’s
a little bit worrying when you get more excited about a Star Trek movie than
you do a Star Wars one. Luckily, fans of the latter finally have something to
get enthusiastic about now JJ Abrams is on the case.
After the crew of the Enterprise find an unstoppable force
of terror from within their organization, Captain Kirk leads a manhunt to a
dangerous world to capture a one man weapon of mass destruction, battling
Robocop and trying to outwit Sherlock along the way. It’s gripping stuff.
Abrams has created such a dazzling universe I can’t wait to see it without
getting a headache halfway through. London has never looked so enticing, and
the opening gambit across a brightly coloured vista is beautiful in its design
and breath-taking in its action.
Into Darkness is replete with wonderful set-pieces, unexpected
emotional depth and gratifying one-liners, helped by a strong cast and two
exemplary villains. I’m sure there are plenty of smart nods for those Trekkies
seeking such indulgence, but for the rest of us there are scantily clad
females, three-ways and swear words. Everyone is a winner. Apart from Odeon,
obviously. DW
No comments:
Post a Comment