Looking to book a last minute break? At Twistedwing Travel, we
understand that it’s the little things that make the big difference. That’s why
we’re dedicated in making your holiday special. We aim to make foreign travel
accessible to all, so instead of soggy trips to the seaside, in no time at all
you’ll be jetting off to the Continent for a dose of sun and fun.
With a huge collection of holidays to choose from,
we’ll help you find a break that’s right for you. We don’t just give you a huge
choice of holiday destinations, either. We bring you the very best destinations
from around the world. So whether you’re looking for Aussie sunshine, thrills
and spills in arctic Norway or a last-minute deal to the Mediterranean, we’ll
take you there. Here is a selection of our finest locations.
Spain
If you’re seeking an
island getaway, go for the peace and quiet of pretty Almanzora, where the
stunning scenery is wrapped up in a great big warm welcome. There’s something
for everyone here. If you like to explore, it offers a wealth of sights to be
discovered.
Check out the piazza, the
bars and the stores, all completely deserted. Walk round the cobbled streets
and witness a little girl beating an old man to death with his cane, or just
kick back by the harbour side, as swarms of children attack you and your boat.
There’s never a dull moment. You may even be allowed to participate in one of
the local traditions, an innocent game of human piñata. Child-friendly,
Almanzora will make all your dreams come true (not suitable for heavily
pregnant women).
Belgium
There’s a good reason you
won’t have heard a lot about Belgium holidays. Belgium doesn’t like to boast.
Small, beautiful and sophisticated, with a naughty glint in its eye – you can
tell Audrey Hepburn was born here, and if you head for the swampy Hautes Fagnes
region of Liège, you’ll probably die here. Perfect for hiking, biking and bags
of fresh air, not so good if your car breaks down, or for females in general,
the isolated community of animal-lovers will welcome you at the local bar with
a song and a dance like you’ve never seen before – a truly memorable and
haunting holiday awaits.
France
From romantic Paris to the
rolling vineyards of Champagne and vast beaches of Brittany through to the
sun-drenched fields of the Loire, travelling to France promises to tantalise
and tickle your holiday taste buds like nowhere else. The cities may be
spellbinding, but why not venture further afield at one of our rural retreats. Here,
you’ll make friends to last a lifetime, and unexpected romance could certainly
be on the cards.
Each property welcomes
pets, especially of the cat and mouse variety, while their romantic settings
could certainly go to your head. Dine at the truck-stop restaurant with a menu
devoted to local produce; sip a classic Burgundy served by the neighbourly
bartender, or simply step away from the cut-throat world and soak up the quiet
life you probably thought was implausible.
Germany
Fairy-tale buildings
nestling in pine-scented forests, beers festivals of epic proportions and an
unrivalled love of David Hasselhoff aren’t the only things you’ll discover in
this vibrant and varied country. Mountains, lakes and woods will get you
reaching for those hiking boots, while the wildlife itself, with its stunning
array of arthropods, will leave you with a lump in your throat.
A truly unique experience,
holidays to Germany come in all shapes and sizes, but it’s the friendliness of
the people that will capture your heart, with each member of the community
coming together to make your trip so magical, helping to form the longest
lasting memories.
Uruguay
One of the most
economically developed countries in South America, noted for its low levels of
corruption, Uruguay was ranked by Reader’s Digest as the ninth most liveable
and greenest country in the world, so why not take your family and venture further
afield to sample its delights?
Stay in one of our
recently renovated properties, away from it all with no civilisation for
hundreds of miles, a slow-paced environment with picture-perfect woodland
(don’t leave your polaroid camera at home) yearning to be explored, but only if
you can drag yourself away from such a beautiful cottage (even if you do,
you’re sure to foolishly venture back inside pretty much straight away).
Norway
Jotunheimen is a mountain
area in southern Norway, covering an area of roughly 3,500 square kilometres,
including Norway’s highest mountain Galdhøpiggen, waterfalls, rivers, lakes,
glaciers, luxuriant valleys and Nazi zombies. Some of Europe’s most spectacular
hiking is here, and is ideally suited for cross-country and alpine skiers,
cyclists and climbers who enjoy the experience of being hunted down by the
walking dead before retiring to their hotel up in the mountains.
Reopened this year but
still oozing seventies charm, run by a slightly reserved gentleman whose
hobbies include stalking and slashing stereotypes. Snowmobiles, pickaxes and
chainsaws are supplied for your pleasure, so why not hang around (intestines
provided) and enjoy the beautiful nature and blood-stained snowy landscape on
offer. Optional extras include tutorials in amputation, first aid with gaffer
tape and how to survive an avalanche.
Australia
A holiday in Australia
will tick all the right boxes: beaches from wild and surf-pounded to gently
lapped shores where the waves would barely tickle a toddler; diverse
landscapes, from the immense, fire-coloured Australian outback to wondrous
rainforests.
Wolf Creek National Park
is another highlight where you’ll visit amazing wild forces of nature, and if
you’re really lucky, a local bushman called Mick Taylor can be seen frolicking
in this baron location. Partial to backpackers, passports, large knives and
abandoned mining sites, the helpful little critter is best viewed from a
distance, but if you do have the privilege of meeting him face to face,
whatever you do, don’t drink the water.
New Zealand
New Zealand is a land of
inspiring landscapes and welcoming people (the animals aren’t to be trusted)
where adventure comes naturally and activities abound. We offer a complete
tailor-made travel service to and around New Zealand, whether you wish to
travel independently (not advisable) or as part of a group, and for the first
time we are introducing a unique farming experience at Oldfield Farm, including
bed and breakfast.
Watch as sheep are
sheared, and then have a go yourself. Hand feed the various animals (don’t bark
at them) before becoming dinner itself. Not for the faint-hearted, or for
anyone with ‘sheep phobia’, what with 40 million of the blood-thirsty animals
roaming the hills, this holiday is ideal for anyone interested in genetic
engineering experiments that go terribly wrong, or for those keen to see
whether or not sheep can work brake pedals.
Hong Kong
If you could imagine the
perfect holiday you would probably conjure up blazing sunshine, riotously
coloured coral reefs and sands softer and whiter than ever before, throwing in eye-popping
visual delights such as mighty temples and spectacular buildings. Instead, we
offer you the playground of the damned, ghosts’ bridge and an embryo tunnel.
The forest of Hang, with its falling dead bodies and long-necked zombies is
another highlight. Sucking you into the strangest of spheres, this trip of a
lifetime delivers such transports of delights you’ll confine all your previous
holidays to the trash, hypnotised by such a haunting locale. There certainly
won’t be any time to finish that book!
Japan
From the stunning sights
of Hokkaido in the temperate north to the sub-tropical islands of Okinawa in
the south, the calm of Japan’s Zen temples, the majesty of its ancient castles,
the peaceful beauty of Mount Fuji and the neon-lit delights of Tokyo make this
one of the most rewarding destinations. Visiting unspoilt areas of natural
beauty, with secluded country walks, you’ll stay in some welcoming traditional
accommodation.
Even if you’re not the
outdoor type, there are still plenty of activities to enjoy, from gurning
competitions to hairstyling, directing your own movie to watching cursed
videotapes. Or you can let your hair down and spend the day in one of the
country’s many wells, visit a psychic medium and explore the neighbouring
volcanic island. Whatever you decide to do, they’ll be nothing more rewarding
than putting your feet up at the end of the evening to watch a bit of
television (due to problems in the past, it’s advisable to always turn the
gogglebox off prior to bed).
Written by Daryl Wing
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